Great coaches don’t fit a mold. Some are loud, some are quiet. Some are intense, some are laid-back. But the best coaches all have one thing in common—they’re real.
If you want to connect with your wrestlers and earn their trust, you have to be yourself. Here’s why authenticity matters and how you can lean into it.
Authentic Coaches Earn More Respect
Athletes follow leaders who are real. If they sense you’re putting on an act, they’ll tune you out.
You don’t need to be a yeller if that’s not who you are. And if you are, don’t tone it down just because someone else takes a quieter approach.
Be honest about your personality and coaching style. The more real you are, the more your wrestlers will trust you.
Fake Coaching Styles Fall Apart
If you try to copy another coach’s style, it won’t last.
Maybe you admire a coach who’s fiery and intense, so you try to bring that energy. But if that’s not you, it’ll come off as forced. And your wrestlers will see right through it.
Or maybe you try to be the calm, quiet leader when you’re naturally more animated. You’ll spend more time suppressing your instincts than actually coaching.
Your team doesn’t need a clone of another coach. They need the best version of you.
Find and Lean Into Your Strengths
Not sure how to coach authentically? Here’s a framework to figure it out:
- Identify what comes naturally – Are you naturally energetic? Analytical? Encouraging? Lean into those traits.
- Recognize what feels forced – If something doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t. Cut it out.
- Get feedback – Ask assistant coaches or trusted athletes what they see as your strengths.
- Watch what resonates – Pay attention to what gets the best response from your team.
- Own it – Once you know your style, double down on it. Confidence in yourself will make your coaching stronger.
Growth Doesn’t Mean Changing Who You Are
Coaching is about constant improvement. But improving doesn’t mean imitating.
If you’re naturally intense, you don’t need to become passive to be better. You need to refine your intensity so it motivates rather than overwhelms.
If you’re naturally calm, you don’t need to become a screamer to command respect. You need to find ways to communicate authority within your own style.
Growth should feel like sharpening what’s already there—not forcing something new.
Your Wrestlers Will Respond to the Real You
At the end of the day, athletes respect authenticity.
A coach who knows who they are will always have more impact than one who’s trying to be someone else. Your wrestlers don’t need a perfect coach—they need a real one.
When you lean into your strengths, your team will buy in more. They’ll trust you more. And your coaching will make a bigger difference.
Final Thoughts
Stop trying to be the coach you think you’re supposed to be.
Be the coach you are.
Authenticity builds trust, strengthens connection, and makes you more effective.
So own your style, coach your way, and let your wrestlers see the real you. That’s what they’ll follow.